Chapter 5: Sexual Orientation

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About this Chapter
Everyone has a sexual orientation—that is, we are romantically and sexually attracted to either men, women, or both—and an estimated 10 percent of the population is not heterosexual. Women who have sex with women and men who have sex with men may identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual—or they may not use any label at all. Although we do not know precisely what determines a person’s sexual orientation, we do know that it is formed early in life, is not chosen by the person, and cannot be changed, although its expression is often sublimated because of social taboos and homophobia.

It is important to discuss sexual orientation with young people, as many will experiment sexually with friends of the same sex or may have crushes on friends, acquaintances, or celebrities of the same sex. They should know that such encounters or thoughts are a natural part of being human and do not necessarily mean that they are gay.

Being gay is not a deviation or illness, but in many countries, homophobia and discrimination drive gay people to hide their sexual orientation from public view because they fear repression and violence. Many suffer in silence and secrecy, and some pretend to be heterosexual, marrying and having families to conform to social expectations. Homophobia puts gay and lesbian youth at particular risk for violence, discrimination, depression, and self-destructive behaviors, like drug and alcohol abuse or suicide. They may also engage in unprotected sex and are more likely to experience sexual health problems, such as unwanted pregnancy (young women questioning their sexual orientation may have sex with men) and STIs, including HIV/AIDS. In teaching about sexual orientation, we are seeking to dispel myths with accurate information and to fight hatred, ignorance, discrimination, and violence by building empathy and tolerance.